UPDATE: My puppy turned my vibrator into a family helicopter... but somehow we survived and I’m not moving countries anymore (25F)

1 part: [https://www.reddit.com/r/stories/comments/1rdcjei/my\_puppy\_turned\_my\_vibrator\_into\_a\_family/](https://www.reddit.com/r/stories/comments/1rdcjei/my_puppy_turned_my_vibrator_into_a_family/)

Hey everyone, OP here. First off holy shit thank you for all the comments, awards, and virtual hugs over the last week. You guys literally carried me through the worst embarrassment of my life. I was legit considering changing my name and fleeing to Canada.

So things have actually turned around in the most unexpected way.

Day 4 of me hiding in my room like a gremlin. Mom knocks softly, says “honey we need to talk… but not like that.” I open the door a crack, ready for the lecture of the century. Instead she’s holding a cup of tea and looking amused? Turns out Dad had been avoiding eye contact with everyone, but Mom sat him down and basically said “she’s 25, she’s single, it’s a normal thing, get over it.” Dad mumbled something about “didn’t need to see it at breakfast” but then admitted he was more embarrassed for me than anything.

Brother still teases me mercilessly but now it’s affectionate. Calls me “Helicopter Girl” and makes buzzing noises when I walk by. I hate him, but I also love him.

The real plot twist: Puppy. That little chaos demon. After the incident he kept bringing me “gifts” socks, my hair ties, one of Dad’s slippers like he knew he fucked up and was trying to apologize. Yesterday he curled up in my lap while I was crying-laughing at your comments, and just stayed there. Mom walked in, saw us, and goes “see? Even he’s sorry.” Then she hugged me and whispered “next time put it in the drawer, sweetheart.” No judgment, just mom energy.

We had family dinner last night. First time I left my room properly. Everyone pretended it never happened until brother fake-coughed “bzzz bzzz” and we all cracked up. Even Dad chuckled (red-faced, but chuckled). Mom poured extra wine and said “life’s too short to die of embarrassment over a toy.”

So yeah. I’m not moving countries. Balcony privileges restored. Puppy gets extra treats for emotional support. And I finally bought a lock for my bedroom door.

Comments

So my wife’s going to a gala tonight — as her client’s “date.”

I’m 44 and my wife is 44. She works on an art advisory committee, so attending galas, events, and client meetings is part of her job. She often meets clients for coffee, lunch, or dinner, and I don’t always know the details and that’s completely normal because it’s part of her work. She’s always professional, transparent about her friendships, and I trust her judgment completely. Recently, she mentioned she’s going to a gala with a friend, S. He’s a wealthy client she met about a year ago, and they became friends professionally. She introduced me to him once, and he seems like a genuinely good person. He invited her as his “date” to this gala, and my wife said it’s fine. I did ask her though, if she’s actually going as a “date,” and she just laughed and said, “Date doesn’t always mean romantic.” She said it’s important for her she could get networking and meet new people. Then she smiled and said, “If I get into this gala next time, I won’t need to take that man with me, I’ll take you...

I accidentally started a fake relationship with my dentist’s nephew and now I have to bring him to my cousin’s wedding

I swear this isn’t as insane as it sounds. Or maybe it is. I don’t know anymore. So I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled last month. All four. It was horrible. I cried when they put the numbing stuff in. Not from pain, just vibes. The dentist was this sweet older guy, probably in his 60s, super gentle, gave dad energy. Anyway, after the whole thing I’m in the waiting room with a mouth full of gauze, looking like a bloated chipmunk and trying not to drool on myself. This guy walks in. Maybe 20-ish. Tall, curly hair, kind of goofy looking but in a hot way. He smiles at me and goes, “You look like you fought a squirrel and lost.” I flip him off. With love. Apparently he’s the dentist’s nephew. He was dropping off lunch or something, I wasn’t listening. I was trying to keep my face from leaking. He sits down and starts chatting with me while I wait for my ride. I don’t say much because again, gauze goblin. But I must’ve made an impression because later that night I get a message on Instagr...

I got into a fight with a Netflix actor and didn’t even knew who he was

So this happened last year. I was working as a bartender in this kinda fancy bar in LA where a lot of people come to show off. You get influencers, actors, TikTok people… that kind of crowd. One Friday night, this guy comes in with a girl. He looked like some Hollywood dude. Tall, kinda flashy, wearing expensive shit, beard perfectly trimmed, just screaming “I think I’m important.” The girl he was with was one of those types that look like they live on Instagram. She didn’t say much. He, on the other hand, was being loud and acting like he owned the place. Demanding a table that was already reserved, talking down to waitresses, trying to be funny but really just being a jerk. Then he said something to my coworker (who’s really sweet btw) like: Are your hands good for anything other than pouring drinks? She just looked shocked. I saw red. I told him, Yo man, maybe treat people like people, not like background extras in your life. He gave me that look like, you don’t know who you’re tal...

Bimql chhetry.

Search This Blog