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Went over to help my elderly neighbor and got an unexpected surprise

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So, I (M28) and my fiancé (F26) bought a house recently and we have an older neighbor directly across the street who is 76. She’s VERY friendly with us ever since we moved in earlier this year— maybe even a little too friendly. Like, she has a glass door that she sits in front of everyday, so every single time we walk out the front door she comes over to immediately engage us in a 30min conversation. I know what everyone’s thinking— she’s just elderly and lonely and wants someone to talk to. Although, keep in mind she has two “boy-toys” between the ages of 50 and 70 who frequently come over for booty calls and weed smoking, along with other family and friends, so she’s not that lonely. She’s a sweet older lady who just likes to share stories and give us gifts (fruit, pictures, mugs, etc). Often times she’ll call me over to help her with different things (fixing her printer, knocking down wasp nests, etc etc) and I’m polite so I always go over to help her when she calls. One day, she asks me to come over and help her find an email on her computer. She’d been dealing with a financial situation spurred on by her inadvertently ordering thousands of items on Temu (that’s another story) and she needed help finding the return labels they emailed her. So, I come in the front door and she takes me past these mountains of Temu packages to the back room where her 15 year old laptop is (just a guess). She has her email open, and the pc is moving extremely slow. So, I sit down and start sifting through her inbox… and I realize it is Absolutely Filthy. She has a massive amount of email notifications from porn and hookup sites, advertising horny partners and dildos and other obscene stuff that most people wouldn’t want a neighbor to see. So, I’m playing it cool and just trying to sift through this massive amount of porn to find these Temu receipts that are nowhere to be found. Long story short, we figure out she has the wrong email open. So, many eons later, we open her other email in another window and that inbox is just as dirty. I’m sifting through all these dirty emails, until she’s like “OH maybe it’s that one!” grabbing my hand on the mouse to click open one of these filthy emails and when it opens, dear god— it’s a GIF of a sweaty woman getting absolutely plowed by some huge dude on a bed. And she’s just standing behind me silent, staring at the screen watching for a few seconds. Then nonchalantly she’s like “Nah, that’s not it”, finally clicks out of it, goes to another one “maybe it’s this one!”— opens another image of a Huge dude stroking it mid-orgasm. She stares for a few seconds…. “Nahhh, that’s not it”. She does that like two more times before I finally got the mouse back from her and finally scrolled enough to find this Temu return label from like 2 weeks ago. Open it up and, lo and behold, it’s a vibrator… So I’m like, …. Is this the one..? And she’s like “oh yeah, it didn’t work worth a shit so I’m getting my money back for that one.” So I help her download the label and then move onto the next one— a mug with butterflies on it. Help her download that and move onto the next one— a 2-pack of cock rings. Long story short, after the fourth package I decided this was all above my “pay grade” as her unlucky neighbor and got her to call her nephew who apparently works on computers so he could help her get the other hundreds of Temu return labels. This woman has been almost like a grandma figure to my fiancé and I since we moved here, so this was one of the strangest events I’d ever experienced. There was another very unfortunate time that she was having trouble with her phone because she thought she’d “accidentally blocked” her sister— so as I’m clicking around I open up her messenger app, and it opens directly into her sexting chat with some guy and the bottom half of a nude selfie disappearing off the screen. At face value, all of this feels like just unfortunate happenstance of an elderly neighbor trying to understand technology. Although there have been strange comments and moments where I’ve wondered if she might be hitting on me— like this one time I was out doing yard work, she came over and was like “Mmm-mmm, you have nice legs”, or this one time calling me asking me to come over and grab something from her and her answering the door in a towel… Anyways, it’s been enough to make my fiancé not like her as much, and make me question when she invites me over late at night to help her do little in-house chores. submitted by /u/Material-Formal-8387 [link] [comments]

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