We live together in a small apartment and, for the most part, we had a really good relationship.
About three months ago, he started acting differently.
He became weirdly protective of his phone.
If I walked into the room while he was texting, he’d immediately lock it.
He also started sleeping with his phone underneath his pillow.
I asked him about it once and he laughed and said I was being paranoid.
I trusted him, so I dropped it.
Then one night, I woke up around 3am because I couldn’t sleep.
He wasn’t beside me.
I walked into the living room and saw him sitting on the sofa with his phone.
He looked up and immediately locked it.
I asked what he was doing.
He said he couldn’t sleep.
I didn’t think much of it.
But the next morning, I noticed something strange.
He had changed his phone password.
That was when I started getting suspicious.
A week later, he told me he was going out with his friends.
He got dressed up more than usual, put on cologne and spent about half an hour doing his hair.
I joked, “Who are you trying to impress?”
He laughed.
“Obviously you.”
He left around 8pm.
At around midnight, I received a message from an unknown number.
It said:
**“You really need to ask your boyfriend where he was tonight.”**
I thought it was someone messing with me.
I replied:
**“Who is this?”**
They didn’t answer.
Instead, they sent me a photo.
It was my boyfriend.
Standing outside a hotel.
With another woman.
I felt sick.
I called him immediately.
No answer.
I called again.
Nothing.
At around 2am, he finally came home.
I showed him the photo.
He just stared at it.
Then he said something I wasn’t expecting.
**“That’s my sister.”**
I didn’t believe him.
He told me she’d recently moved back into the country and he hadn’t told me because they’d had a huge argument.
I asked why they were outside a hotel.
He said she was staying there temporarily.
I wanted to believe him.
So I did.
For about three days.
Then I found the same woman on Instagram.
She wasn’t his sister.
She was someone he’d worked with.
I confronted him.
He finally admitted he’d lied.
But he swore they hadn’t slept together.
He said they’d only been talking.
I asked why he was meeting her at a hotel.
He said:
**“Because I knew you’d get upset.”**
That sentence completely broke something inside me.
Not because of the hotel.
Because he had already decided that hiding things from me was easier than telling me the truth.
I packed a bag and went to stay with my mum.
He called me constantly.
Hundreds of messages.
He kept saying he loved me and that he’d made one stupid mistake.
Then, two days later, the other woman contacted me.
She sent me screenshots.
Apparently, they’d been talking for **six months**.
There were messages from nights when I’d been lying next to him in bed.
Messages he’d sent while I was asleep.
And then I saw something that made me realise the hotel wasn’t even the worst part.
One message from him said:
**“She has no idea I’m planning to leave her.”**
I stared at that message for ages.
Because I’d been sitting at home thinking I was trying to save our relationship.
Meanwhile, he’d already decided it was over.
I didn’t confront him about the screenshots.
I just sent him one message:
**“You don’t have to worry about leaving me anymore. I’ve already left.”**
Then I blocked him.
He eventually contacted my mum and asked her to convince me to talk to him.
She told him no.
It’s been three weeks now.
I still miss him.
And that’s the part I’m struggling with.
Because I know he treated me horribly.
But I still miss the person I thought he was.
So, Reddit…
**Should I give him another chance?**
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