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Agreed with my Uber driver. Homeless dude wasn't ugly.

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While my Uber driver and I were waiting at a red light, we noticed a homeless man walking from car to car with a sign that said "too ugly to prostitute, no money for food, please help." I gave the Uber driver my lunch and asked him to please give it to the homeless man, who was now approaching the Uber driver. The Uber driver rolled down his window, handed the homeless man my lunch, and said the following in a very thick Jamaican accent:

Uber driver: *My young brodah, you are not ugly. You are beautiful. You remind me of my son. He is very handsome. Like his fadah. Da girls and da gays love my boy. I'm sure his balls are always empty. You are not ugly. Do you understand? You are lying. God bless. Goodbye now.*

Lol I think he had more to say, but the light turned green mid monologue.

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