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My brother’s death anniversary tradition ended my 9-month relationship

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I (F26) lost my younger brother when I was 22. He had cancer and fought so hard. Since then, every year on the anniversary of his death, I take the day off work, donate blood, visit his grave, and then go home to relax and watch his favorite movie. It’s a small, personal tradition, but it means a lot to me.

My boyfriend, Ben (M29), asked me to have lunch with him and his dad yesterday. I’ve met his dad many times before, so it wasn’t like a “meet the parents for the first time” thing. I told Ben I couldn’t and explained my tradition. He got upset and said something like, “It’s my tradition to have lunch with my dad whenever he’s in town, and he really wanted to see you! You can do your blood donation thing any other day.”

I tried to explain that it’s not just about donating blood it’s about remembering my brother. Later that evening, while I was watching his favorite movie, Ben texted again asking me to join them. I repeated that I wouldn’t come this time but would hang out with his dad another day. He replied that I’d embarrassed him in front of his dad with my “selfishness” and “laziness.”

Since then, he’s been distant. I texted him saying we needed to talk. He never replied and just blocked me on everything social media, WhatsApp, everything. Even his best friend who followed me on Instagram blocked me.

I’m not sad. Honestly, I think this tradition saved me from getting into a relationship that would’ve been a lifetime of misery.

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