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My sister tried to sabotage my college applications, and now she wants my help. I said no.

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This happened last year, but I still think about it sometimes, especially now that I’m getting ready to leave for college.

I (18M) have always been kind of the "academic" kid in the family. I studied hard, joined all the right clubs, volunteered, all of that. College was a huge deal for me. I spent months prepping applications, writing my Common App essay, editing, rewriting… the works. I was aiming high—top-tier schools—and I knew the essays could make or break me.

My sister (20F) is older by two years. We used to be close growing up—movie nights, late-night talks, all of it. But things changed after she dropped out of college during her first semester. She came back home and started working odd jobs, kind of aimless, and I think somewhere along the way, resentment built up.

She started making these passive-aggressive comments all the time. Stuff like, “Oh look, the golden child got another A,” or “Mom and Dad basically built a shrine to your report cards.” I always brushed it off as sarcasm, but it got under my skin more than I wanted to admit.

Anyway, one night I opened up my Common App essay on our shared desktop—rookie mistake, I know—and something felt… off. It had been *rewritten.* Not edited—*rewritten*. It didn’t sound like me at all. Full of spelling mistakes, weird angry rants about pressure and failure, stuff I never said. I panicked at first, thinking I must’ve opened the wrong file, but no. It was *my* file. I checked the file history and saw it: her username, logged in the night before.

I confronted her. She didn’t even deny it. Just gave me this smug look and said, “Guess you’re not so perfect after all.”

I completely lost it.

We got into a screaming match and she eventually blurted out that she was “tired of being ignored” and “sick of living in my shadow.” I told my parents what happened. They were shocked, but honestly? Nothing really came of it. They told her she needed to “work on herself” and didn’t punish her beyond that. No apology from her, either. Just silence.

Luckily, I had a backup copy of my essay saved. I submitted everything, got into three of my top schools, and I’m heading off in the fall. I thought that chapter was closed.

Until last week.

She came into my room and asked if I could help her write a résumé and cover letter for a job she really wanted. No apology, no acknowledgment of what she did—just acted like nothing happened.

I told her no. I told her I couldn’t trust her after what she did and that she burned that bridge.

She looked surprised, maybe even hurt. My parents later told me I was being “petty” and “holding a grudge.” But honestly? I don’t think I am. What she did could’ve derailed my entire future. She didn’t just mess with a file—she tried to sabotage something I worked years for.

I’m not going to sabotage her back. But I’m not going to be her safety net either.

If she wants to rebuild trust, she can start by owning up to what she did. Until then, I’m focusing on what I’ve earned.

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