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You're all dumb little pieces of doo-doo Trash. Nonfiction.

The following is 100% factual and well documented. Just ask chatgpt, if you're too stupid to already know this shit. ((TL;DR you don't have your own opinions. you just do what's popular. I was a stripper, so I know. Porn is impossible for you to resist if you hate the world and you're unhappy - so, you have to watch porn - you don't have a choice. You have to eat fast food, or convenient food wrapped in plastic. You don't have a choice. You have to injest microplastics that are only just now being researched (the results are not good, so far - what a shock) - and again, you don't have a choice. You already have. They are everywhere in your body and plastic has only been around for a century, tops - we don't know shit what it does (aside from high blood pressure so far - it's in your blood). Only drink from cans or normal cups. Don't heat up food in Tupperware. 16oz bottle of water = over 100,000 microplastic particles - one fucking bottle! Shit...
Recent posts

I Let a Stranger Borrow My Charger at the Airport. Six Months Later, She Changed My Life

So I was stuck on this long layover in Denver. The airport was super crowded and every outlet was taken. People were basically guarding their chargers like their lives depended on it. I noticed this woman nearby who looked pretty stressed. She kept checking her phone and you could tell it was about to die. I had my power bank with me and, for once, it was actually charged. So I just handed it to her and said, “Hey, you can use this if you want.” She looked at me like I just handed her a winning lottery ticket. Are you serious? yeah go for it I said. While her phone charged, we started talking. She had just come from a job interview and was heading home. Told me she hadn’t worked in over a year and wasn’t sure if she was still cut out for it. I told her she totally was. We ended up chatting for like half an hour before I had to board. She gave me back the charger, thanked me a bunch, and that was it. Then last week, I went to this local networking thing I almost skipped. Halfway throug...

I Let a Stranger Borrow My Charger at the Airport. Six Months Later, She Changed My Life

So I was stuck on this long layover in Denver. The airport was super crowded and every outlet was taken. People were basically guarding their chargers like their lives depended on it. I noticed this woman nearby who looked pretty stressed. She kept checking her phone and you could tell it was about to die. I had my power bank with me and, for once, it was actually charged. So I just handed it to her and said, “Hey, you can use this if you want.” She looked at me like I just handed her a winning lottery ticket. Are you serious? yeah go for it I said. While her phone charged, we started talking. She had just come from a job interview and was heading home. Told me she hadn’t worked in over a year and wasn’t sure if she was still cut out for it. I told her she totally was. We ended up chatting for like half an hour before I had to board. She gave me back the charger, thanked me a bunch, and that was it. Then last week, I went to this local networking thing I almost skipped. Halfway throug...

I’ve Always Known My Family Wasn’t Human. Now My Fiancée Wants to Meet Them.

I’m writing this because my fiancée is cleaning the apartment like we’re hosting royalty. She’s been at it since noon. Vacuuming twice. Rearranging the throw pillows. Lighting candles we’ve never used. Every few minutes she asks if my parents prefer red or white wine, as if I would know. They’ll be here in three hours. I haven’t seen them in eight years. That wasn’t an accident. I told her I had a difficult childhood. That we weren’t close. That distance was healthier for everyone. I made it sound like emotional baggage. Old arguments. Personality differences. I did not tell her the truth. I didn’t tell her that I left home the moment I legally could and never slept another night under that roof. I didn’t tell her that I have spent most of my adult life carefully avoiding letting anyone I love meet the people who raised me. She thinks this dinner is reconciliation. I think it’s a mistake. The worst part is that I didn’t invite them. She did. Last week, while I was at work, she found m...

I sent nudes to my work husband. Wrong chat. It went straight to my actual boss. He replied in under a minute.

Throwaway. Obviously. I’ve had this running joke with my coworker Marcus for almost a year. We call each other work spouses, roast each other in the group chat, and somehow the flirting never felt dangerous… until last night. I was feeling myself after a night out. Took a couple mirror pics that were very much not safe for work. Meant to drop them in our private chat with a stupid caption. My thumb slipped. Hit the wrong thread. The one labeled “Daniel – Boss.” I stared at the screen in pure horror for three full seconds. Then the typing bubble appeared. Daniel: “Bold of you to assume I wouldn’t appreciate this.” My soul left my body. I started typing every version of “WRONG PERSON I’M SO SORRY PLEASE FORGET THIS” but before I could send anything he double-texted: “Don’t apologize. And don’t delete them. I’ve thought about you like this more than once.” I should have blocked him. Reported him. Burned my phone. Instead I sat there with my heart slamming and wrote back, “…...

I walked into my apartment and heard moaning coming from my roommate’s room. Except… he wasn’t home. And the voice that just said my name wasn’t his.

Okay, throwaway for obvious reasons. I’ve been living with my best friend’s older brother, Jake, for six months. He’s 29, ridiculously attractive in that quiet, brooding way, and we had a very clear rule: no weirdness. Just two adults splitting rent. Last Friday I got home early from work. The second I opened the door I heard it — soft, breathy, and very clearly coming from Jake’s room. I froze. He texted me that morning saying he was staying at his parents’ for the weekend. I should have left. I didn’t. I walked closer and that’s when I heard it: my name. Moaned. Like someone was thinking about me while they… I knocked. The sound stopped immediately. Heart pounding, I said, “Jake…?” Silence. Then the door opened. It wasn’t Jake. It was his identical twin, Tyler. Same face, same height, same everything… except Tyler had this look in his eyes that Jake never did. Like he’d been caught doing something he wasn’t entirely sorry about. He was shirtless. Sweat on his chest. And he...

My wife has been secretly homeschooling our daughter a completely different religion for three years. I found out from my own kid.

I need to explain this carefully because it still doesn’t feel real to me. My wife, we’ll call her Melissa, has handled most of our daughter’s schooling since we made the decision to homeschool when she was seven. I work long hours, she manages the curriculum, and I trusted that completely, because Melissa has always been organized and thorough about everything. Our daughter is ten now. Last weekend, we were at my parents’ house for Sunday dinner, which has always included grace before the meal, standard stuff we’ve done her entire life. My daughter, out of nowhere, asked if she could say a different kind of blessing instead, one she said she “always says at home.” Then she recited something none of us had ever heard before, in a tone like it was completely normal, something she’d clearly said hundreds of times. My mom looked at me, confused. I looked at Melissa. Melissa’s face went pale. Later that night, I asked my daughter more questions, gently, trying to understand what I’d ju...