My name’s Evan Cole, I’m forty-six years old, and I’ve been a landlord for just over nineteen years, which is long enough to get comfortable, maybe too comfortable, because until this happened I genuinely believed I’d already seen every trick a bad tenant could pull. The house was a plain three-bedroom at the end of a quiet cul-de-sac, the kind of place neighbors forget exists, and the tenant, Ryan, had been ideal for almost a year—quiet, respectful, rent always early—right up until the month it didn’t show up at all. At first it was excuses, then silence, and when I finally drove over to check on things, the first thing that told me I was in trouble was the security camera bolted above the front door, cheap plastic, crooked install, aimed straight at the driveway, something I absolutely had not approved or installed. Before I even knocked, the door cracked open and Ryan stood there with his phone already raised and recording, calm in a way that felt rehearsed, telling me I couldn’t b...
So my wife and I have been married for 35 years. I have some medical issues that require me taking blood thinners. We went out to dinner last night at the local Applebee's. We had just finished ordering when my wife noticed a bruise on my wrist. She asked how it happened? I told her "You put the cuffs on to tight last night" a bit louder then normal. She starts to say something back but I cut her off with "And the ball gag was already straped on, so when I went to tell you all I could get out was Unh unh uuunnhhh" the table behind me burst out laughing. My wife is trying to crawl under the table. The waitress was delivering our drinks then and was having a hard time keeping a straight face. My wife finally says "Whatever" We eat our dinner and the waitress comes over after we are done and tells us that the couple behind us paid our bill because we gave them a good laugh. So my wife couldn't really be mad at me.